Tuesday, March 27, 2007

You Know You're In Texas, When.....

  1. You see more Texan flags than American flags.
  2. You know someone who ate the 72 oz steak and got it for free.
  3. You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry, and your Cowboy Boots.
  4. You can write a check at Dairy Queen for 2 Hungr-Busters and fries.
  5. You prefer Whataburger to McDonalds.
  6. You dress up to go shopping at the mall.
  7. You've hung ornaments and tinsel on a tumbleweed and used it as a Christmas tree.
  8. You're disappointed when a food doesn't come in spicy flavor.
  9. You know from experience that rattlesnake meat tastes like chicken.
  10. You can tell a rock from an armadillo at 300 yards.
  11. You know what a 'Cowboy Cadillac' is.
  12. You have both a dog and a brother-in-law named Bud
  13. Your local grocery store sells cactus in the Fresh Produce department
  14. You watch the movie Urban Cowboy and laugh at the phony Texan accents
  15. You choose a brand of Mexican salsa with the same care that another might use to select a bottle of fine wine
  16. You think that the 4 basic food groups are nachos, bar-b-que, fajitas, and Copenhagen.
  17. You refer to the Dallas Cowboys as "God's favorite football team"
  18. You know whether another Texan is from South, West, East, North, or Central Texas as soon as they open their mouth.
  19. You don't consider people from Austin to be real Texans.
  20. Your Pastor wears boots.
  21. There is no such thing as a "secret" sin.
  22. The Blue Book value on your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
  23. Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
  24. Roadrunners dont say Beep Beep
  25. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Texas.
  26. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Texas, plus a couple no ones seen before.
  27. Possums will eat anything.
  28. Raccoons will test your crop of melons and let you know when they are ripe.
  29. If it grows, it sticks. If it crawls, it bites.
  30. Nothing will kill a mesquite tree.
  31. There are valid reasons some people put concertina wire around their house.
  32. You cannot find a country road without a curve from corner to corner.
  33. A tractor is NOT an all-terrain vehicle, they do get stuck.
  34. The wind blows at 90 MPH from Oct. 2 until June 25, then it stops totally until Oct 2.
  35. Onced and Twiced are good words.
  36. It is not a shopping cart it is a buggy.
  37. Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
  38. Graduating 1st in your class means you left in the 8th grade.
  39. Coldbeer actually is one word.
  40. People really grow and eat okra.
  41. Green grass DOES burn.
  42. When you live in the country, you dont have to buy a dog. City people drop them off at your gate in the middle of the night.
  43. When a buzzard sits on the fence and stares at you, its time to go to the doctor.
  44. Fixinto is one word.
  45. The word dinner is confusing. Theres only lunch and then theres supper.
  46. Backards and forards means I know everything about you.
  47. Jeeet? is actually a phrase meaning Did you eat?
  48. You work until youre done or its too dark to see.
  49. You measure distance in minutes.
  50. Youve had to switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
  51. Stores dont have bags; they have sacks.
  52. You know what cow tipping and snipe hunting is.
  53. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Picante.
  54. You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts.
  55. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
  56. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
  57. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, Still summer, and Christmas.
  58. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population over 1000.
  59. Going to Walmart is a favorite past-time known as goin wal-martin or off to Wally World.
  60. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.
  61. A carbonated soft drink isnt a soda, cola, or pop .. its a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.
  62. You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water...
  63. You can say 110 degrees without fainting...
  64. You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off...
  65. You can make instant sun tea...
  66. You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron...
  67. The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly...
  68. You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car...
  69. You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window...
  70. You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance...
  71. Hot water now comes out of both taps...
  72. It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets...
  73. You actually burn your hand opening the car door...
  74. You break a sweat the instant you step outside... at 7:30 a.m. before work...
  75. No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning...
  76. Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?...
  77. You realize that asphalt has a liquid state...
  78. Its illegal to have a tattoo until youre 18, but children of all ages can play with guns
  79. You dont think its weird to drink a beer at anytime of day, even the morning
  80. You think its weird not to drink a beer
  81. You can drive all day and not leave the state
  82. The confederate flag is flown at your high school, the team is even named after it
  83. You shop at HEB
  84. The town you live in is bigger than Rhode island
  85. You see more trucks on your daily commute than youll see in the state of New Jersey
  86. Your high school football stadium is equal to, or better, than most professional stadiums
  87. You know there are more longhorn, cattle and steer than there people in the state
  88. We dont have an ocean; we have a gulf
  89. You know someone who is named Pedro or Martin
  90. Their last name is Gonzales, Martinez or Rodriguez
  91. You eat tacos for breakfast
  92. You think Dr. Pepper is the best damn coke in the world
  93. The extensions of the index and pinky make for the best hand gesture in the world besides the shocker
  94. The best parties are on at least two acres of land
  95. You can go anywhere with a gun on your truck and no one thinks twice about it
  96. You know someone with a gun related injury
  97. Getting stuck in the mud is a challenge, not an avoidance
  98. We panic when there is an inch of snow on the ground
  99. Air conditioning is standard on every car sold here
  100. You've said I've never met a Jewish person before
  101. You design your Halloween costume to fit over Wranglers and cowboy boots.
  102. The mosquitoes have landing lights.
  103. You have more miles on your tractor than your car.
  104. You have 10 favorite recipes for deer meat.
  105. You've taken your kids trick-or-treating when it was 90 degrees outside.
  106. The preacher says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering." and five guys stand up.
  107. A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of."
  108. When it rains, everyone is smiling.
  109. The choir group is known as the "OK Chorale."
  110. Four generations of the same family sit together in worship.
  111. There is no such thing as a "secret" sin.
  112. Baptism is referred to as "branding."
  113. Finding and returning lost sheep isn't just a parable.
  114. High notes on the organ can set the dogs to howling.
  115. People wonder, when Jesus fed 5,000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish.
  116. The final words of the benediction are, "Ya'll come back now, ya hear?"
  117. It's a common misconception that everything is twice as big in Texas, really, everything is 1.965 times bigger, but we round up.
  118. It's a common misconception that the women have big hair. In fact this was outlawed in July 1977. There is a task force and they are doing their best to reach every last woman. Bear with us.
  119. A visitor to Texas once asked, "Does it ever rain out here?" A rancher quickly answered "Yes, it does. Do you remember that part in the Bible where it rained for 40 days and 40 nights?"The visitor replied, "Yes, I'm familiar with Noah's flood." "Well," the rancher puffed up, we got 'bout two and a half inches of that."
  120. A sad Texan once prayed, "I wish it would rain - not so much for me, cuz I've seen it - but for my 7-year-old."
  121. Sunscreen is sold year round, kept at the front of the checkout counter . . .
  122. A formula less than 30 SPF is a joke and you only wear that to go to the corner store . . .
  123. You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Ennis, Waxahachie, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls, San Antonio, Mexia, Waco, and Amarillo.
  124. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
  125. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
  126. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
  127. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
  128. You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
  129. You arent surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
  130. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Chevy 3500 4Ã4 is.
  131. You know everything goes better with Ranch.
  132. You go to the river/lake because you think it is like going to the ocean.
  133. You go to the gas station and there is a sign in the window that reads, No Shoes, No Shirt, No Service!
  134. Your family pet is the stray dog with one leg that came limping up to your door.
  135. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
  136. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road."
  137. I drive a pickup truck because I want to.
  138. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
  139. They are cattle & oil wells. That's what they smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-20 and I-10 go east and west, I-35 goes north and south. Pick one.
  140. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 cotton strippers that are driven only 3 weeks a year.
  141. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
  142. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of doves are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.
  143. Yeah, we eat catfish & crawfish. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.
  144. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
  145. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
  146. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice.
  147. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
  148. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.
  149. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -- it spooks the fish.
  150. Colleges? Try Texas Tech, Texas A&M, University of Texas or Texas State. Kids come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
  151. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than any other state
  152. Always remember what our great governor Sam Houston once said:"Texas can make it without the United States, but the United States can't make it without Texas!"

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Troop Supporters?

Protesters in Portland, Oregon burn an American Flag - and an American soldier in effigy!!! Is this the anti-war, left wing Democrats of today??? How DARE they!!!

Would you hate-monger traitors turn away the Coast Guard when they come to rescue your slimy asses from the dangerous waters off your shores? Would you protesters turn away the National Guard when they come to rescue your slimy asses from a mud slide, avalanche, or flood? Don't bitch if they "can't find you" during their search. But you know that would never happen, don't you? They aren't terroristic morons like you. Unlike you, they value life.

If this doesn't make your blood boil, you are not a troop supporter in any way! These people are no better than the terrorists we're fighting across the Atlantic. They wish their own people dead, too. As far as I'm concerned, these American-hating, death-wishing traitors can go to Gitmo, or straight to Hell! It matters not to me.

May your cowardly faces be put on the internet for all to see.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Rest In Peace, My Friend

A very close friend and "family" member went Home last night (Friday) at about 10:30. Today, the 17th, is his birthday. Although expected as much as could be, it was not expected so soon. It appears he went in his sleep, and simply quit breathing. That part was a blessing. He was riddled with maladies such as heart/lung disease, total kidney failure, a rare form of cancer, etc. He had been beating the odds for quite a while, and was a real fighter.

Jerry had an extraordinary talent for, and love of music. He could play any instrument from the minute he picked it up, or sat at it. He created his own musical scores on his computer. He loved cars - sporty ones, fast ones, classic cars, unique cars, all kinds of cars. He could tell you anything about them.

He will be missed greatly. He was like my brother.

Rest in Peace, Jerry. May God give you the rest you so much desired. Use your talents to make beautiful music for the Lord.

O for the wonderful love he has promised
Promised for you and for me
Though we have sinned,he has mercy and pardon
Pardon for you and for me.
(Lyrics From "Softly and Tenderly")

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Stormy Weather

Storms finally moved through the area last night. I was able to get many shots, some yet undeveloped - on film. Below is some of the light show I captured with my digital.

Shots such as these were nearly non-existent in the Amarillo area last year, a drought being the cause.

It was a beautiful sight, with the storms passing by at a perfect distance for safety and visibility.

I captured this one in video mode with my Samsung:

Here are some I got with my 35mm camera.


This isn't the only stormy weather we've seen lately. One of my best friends has been having health problems - and he took a nose dive on Groundhog Day. We almost lost him due to his health that morning. Today, he has defied the odds and is still with us. Unfortunately, he is not able to stay at home, and nobody can afford to hire a caregiver to be with him. The only option is a 24-hour care facility - a nursing home. He has been uncooperative and verbally combative, having hopes and dreams of returning home. His safety and well-being cannot be sacrificed to allow that to happen. I know it's a very hard pill for him to swallow, but this is the way it has to be - for his own good. If he improves to the point of being able to care for himself in all ways, without fear of falling or other lack of self-care, he'd be welcomed home in a second. If he doesn't change his mind again, he will go there tomorrow.


A few weeks ago, my Dad and older-of-my-two sisters came down for a visit for a few days. It was a bittersweet time. The situation with the friend I mentioned above created a difficult scenario. Knowing they were here, I felt the responsibility and desire/need to spend time with them, and at the same time to "be there" for my friends - the friends I've live with as family for nearly 3 years. It was difficult at times, but I guess it worked out. It was really nice seeing them for the first time in years, but it could have been at a much better time.

I'm still kinda put off by my baby sister, the one who arranged the trip for my other sister, and refused to put it off because of my situation at the time. It seems she has to have everything her way, period. She gets put off when the shoe is on the other foot.


I trust you all got your clocks set ahead one hour. If not, you'll be an hour late for everything today.

I hope you all have been doing well, and continue doing so.

May God Bless!